Dear God in Heaven.

This is what withdrawal feels like.

It sucks.

I can't breathe. I'm so dizzy. I can't stop coughing. My mind is telling me that it will all stop if I just go outside... have a quick drag... just one... then you can quit all over again...

GAH! It has been nearly 24 hours since I looked down and knew that I was smoking my last cigarette. I feel like I'm going to toss cookie all over my desk.

This is all in my head. I have missed days of smoking before (ran out of money) (grandma would have killed me) (why aren't there convenience stores in the woods?) and it was nowhere near this painful. I was a bitch, sure, but this is completely different. Besides, I am in high spirits right now. I can't wait to go home and tell the Dude that I have gone my first day without smoking.

The internet completely failed to distract me. But here we go:

South Africa's smoking chimp is dead of old age - at 52. I am sad at stupidity.

" Mr. Khedama says zookeepers tried to stop visitors from encouraging Charlie in a habit many humans are trying to quit. "

Smoking baby has reportedly quit... please don't read the comments. Head will asplode (I guess it is CNN). But at least the baby has done what I am trying to do.

How to Quit Smoking: Canadian Lung Association read it over and over. And again. And again. These words are my mantra.

" 1. Drink water
2. Deep breaths
3. Delay
4. Do something different "

I have these posted up in my cube. And I feel a bit better.

W.I.